I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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