She is in my trunk
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
