Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize