he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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