And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
