Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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