i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
