Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
