fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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