i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
