Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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