plz talk dirty to me
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
