ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
