Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
