whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
