I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
