Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
