i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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