So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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