is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize
