i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
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