But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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