What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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