it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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