I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Randomize
