So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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