do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
