It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Ladies don't puke and tell
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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