It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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