I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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