She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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