uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
