he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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