Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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