Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
