Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
