At least make sure they are 18
Why
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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