I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
