I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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