Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize