is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
