is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
