I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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