Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize