Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize