I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
