All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
My Sexting was not on an AP level
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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