Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I skipped work to stalk him.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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