Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
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