he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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