And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
